My Dogs and How They Helped Me

It's frightening to have something wrong with you and even more frightening when the doctors just shake their heads in frustration, having no clue what caused it. Imagine having such intense pain in your back and right leg that spreads fire-like through your entire body. I couldn't lift my arms above my shoulders and I needed help to walk. It's what I call The Big Flare Up.

I ended up in the emergency room and was given a shot of Demerol or something equally strong. Tests were done with no clear cause so I was sent home with pain pills. Once the shot wore off, I was still in pain, but it was mostly in my lower back and right leg. It was my leg that bothered me more. It was nerve pain, something I never experienced before and don't care to again. I couldn't feel my leg from my knee down, but what felt like sparks of pain would shoot up my leg to my back and I wanted to cut my leg off. No kidding there. It really hurt. I wanted to fall into a drug-induced coma, and sort of did for a couple of weeks, but I finally fought to pull myself out. Why? Because I was needed. My dogs needed me to care for them. My husband couldn't stay home with me. He had to go to work and make money so we didn't lose our house. So, it was just me and the dogs left at home. They depended on me so I would force myself to get up and feed them and let them outside. In a way, I needed them too.

Dogs have this Zen-like aura around them. They live in the moment and take joy in the simple pleasures in life. When I wanted to fall into the hole of despair because I was frustrated as hell that my body was betraying me, my dogs made me smile. They kept me company and made it easier to deal with all the stress.

Did you know that dogs could get colitis? When I was finally diagnosed with ulcerative colitis about 7 years after that first flare, I was a bit relieved because it explained what initially happened to me. The doctors missed it because I wasn't having the normal symptoms of colitis, but I will get to that in another post. Anyway, one of my dogs has colitis and besides being a really weird coincidence, it's kind of cool in a way. She is my inspiration for learning how to deal with a chronic disease. She never reveals that she is sick and takes pleasure in eating, belly rubs and relaxing outside in the sun. I know she has tummy aches and her joints hurt, but she doesn't wallow in self-pity like I, and most humans, tend to do.

This beautiful girl has colitis.

There is a reason that therapy dogs are used to help people in the hospital. They bring joy to the sick, spreading their calm demeanor around. Just petting my dogs makes me feel better. And last night when I was laying on my mat for my nightly treatment, one of my dogs came over and stretched out next to me to keep me company. As much as I love my husband and need his companionship, I can't picture him lying motionless beside me for thirty minutes on the bathroom floor with no sex involved. Nah. That's what dogs are for. Lying beside me, not the sex! LOL to you perverts out there.

I feel blessed to have a supportive husband and family, but my dogs get credit for pulling me out of a dark time and they continue to comfort me. That feeling of giving into depression still taunts me, more so since my diagnosis of colitis and having to deal with flares and unpleasant treatments along with everything else. All I have to do is pet my dogs or snuggle up against them and a sense of calm washes over me. I know that sounds corny, but it's true. Yeah, I can snuggle up against my hubby too, and I do, but I'm not sure he would allow me to pet him. Or would he? Hmm.

Cheers and good health!

Colitis Chick

Technorati Tags: ulcerative colitis,dogs and colitis,health and dogs,dogs in hospitals,dogs and stress,chronic diseases

Technorati Tags: dogs and colitis,chronic diseases

My dog keeps me company during treament

Coping with a Flare

My colon is really mad at me right now. It’s been almost a year since I had my last flare and now here I am dealing with it all over again.

So, how do I cope with diarrhea that doesn’t respond well to regular, over-the-counter drugs? Well, I learned quickly that eating equals diarrhea. Duh. There is one food that seems to be soothing on the tummy and doesn’t move through me too fast—bananas. Not sure why because I read somewhere that bananas are a laxative. Not in my case. And that’s the weird thing about colitis. Everyone responds differently to foods and medications. It’s all about trial and error. Ginger Ale is also soothing to my tummy and helps with gas and bloating. Wheat crackers and strangely, cream cheese, are also foods I can eat when I have a flare. Cheese products and dairy products in general make me feel bloated so I’m not sure why I can eat cream cheese. I do eat the low fat kind so maybe that’s why. And sadly, I have to cut out chocolate during a flare, but I don’t really want chocolate when I’m flaring because my tummy hurts so it’s not too hard. I will make up for it when I feel better. You will learn what you can and can’t eat when flaring and chances are you won’t feel like eating certain foods. That’s your body’s way of telling you which foods are bad for you.

What do I do if I have to travel somewhere? Eek! Having to travel during a flare just plain sucks and is the worst part of having this disease. When I am flaring I have to stay home. There is nothing more embarrassing than having to use a public bathroom when you have explosive diarrhea. But, if I have to go somewhere, I wouldn’t eat or drink much and I would take Pepto-Bismol or Imodium A-D--if I didn’t have a prescription for Lomotil. When I had my first flare and didn’t have a clue what was happening to my body, Pepto-Bismol helped with the cramping and diarrhea. My doctor told me to avoid medicines with magnesium in them like Mylanta. You should always check with your doctor though before taking anything.

Here’s an important reminder: when you have that urge to go, get to the bathroom. This should be common sense, right? Wrong. I don’t know how many times I thought I could keep writing or reading emails a bit longer and then I have to sprint to the bathroom. Not a pretty sight. Me running. I’ve been told by my husband not to run because apparently I run funny. And when I run to the bathroom my dogs think I am playing and run alongside me, barking and trying to cut me off. Very dangerous. And annoying.

Oh, and wear pants that are easy to undo like elastic banded sweat pants. That makes things much more easier during a flare.

The only good side to having a flare is that I will lose some weight, but everything else about it sucks. Now I have to go through six weeks of nightly enemas. Wee! I can’t think of when I had more fun. Oh yeah, last year at about this time. I try to make the best of it because what else am I going to do? I can’t change what is happening to me. And I suppose it could be a lot worse.

Cheers and good health!

Colitis Chick

My mad colon

Technorati Tags: ulcerative colitis,colon disease,diarrhea,foods for colitis flare,chronic diseases,bananas,wheat crackers,cream cheese,ginger ale,coping with colitis,pepto-bismol,imodium a-d,lomotil

The Joys of Enemas

In my last post I mentioned that the only treatment that worked for my last flare was a Rowasa enema. When my doctor first brought this up to me, I refused the treatment, but later was mad at myself for not using that treatment sooner. I initially refused the treatment because I pictured this painful, messy process. I remember getting an enema once as a kid and it was anything but fun. Not that the new enema treatments are fun, but they are better than what I remember enduring.

True, it’s kind of a hassle because you have to block out thirty minutes of your time in the evening (the enema has to be done at bedtime so that enough time passes after the last meal) to do the procedure, but I found a way to make the time useful and strangely, relaxing. The treatment comes in this huge box so I couldn’t use the drive thru window at Walgreens, I had to go inside and have the pharmacist ask me if I needed him to explain anything to me in front of all the other people waiting. Of course, I quickly told him I would call if I had any questions and bolted out of there.

For six weeks, every night at bedtime, I had an appointment with a small bottle. That’s one thing I really liked—the treatments come in convenient little bottles that can be tossed in the trash when finished. No mess, well, not quite anyway. This is what I did. I brought in a mat that I use to lay by the pool and covered it with an old towel. I used a couple of other old towels to cushion between my legs (you have to lie on your side) and another one as a pillow. I was able to lie down in the master bathroom, and with the door open, I could watch the television in the master bedroom. I also brought in books to read. It was kind of cool. I had that private, quiet time to myself for thirty minutes. The insertion process doesn’t last thirty minutes, that took maybe a minute, but you are supposed to remain in a reclined position for thirty minutes.

It was pretty easy and I liked it so much better than the pills. The enema works best for people with colitis in the lower part of the colon, but it’s always better to check with your doctor as to what treatment works best.

Cheers and good health!

Colitis Chick

Technorati Tags: ulcerative colitis,rowasa enema,colitis treatments

Diary of a Mad Colon

Okay, so I haven't posted anything on here since February of 2008. Part of it is just not wanting to broadcast my illness and part of it is because I just want to forgot about have ulcerative colitis. But I can't forget about the disease because it won't go away. I thought I would have my one flare and it would be fine, but that's not the case. Since my first flare in 2007, I have had another bad flare in 2009 and now I am having another flare. The last one was really bad. I wasn't responding to the Ascol, in fact, the medicine made me much worse. It was the most horrible experience. I was afraid to to eat and leave my house for about two months. Finally, I stopped taking the Asacol and told my doctor it was making me worse. He had originally wanted to treat my flare with a Rowasa enema, but I refused. Stupid me. If I would have listened to my doctor, my flare would have cleared up quicker. The enema works better for me because my colitis is only in the lower part of my colon--lucky me. Having it only in the lower part of the colon is better, but it still has it's downside. In my case I have systemic colitis--meaning the disease extends to other areas outside my colon. My ulcerative colitis has also caused reactive arthritis in me. I suffer from chronic pain all over my body, but the most severe pain is my lower back joints. It's a party having to deal with abdominal pain, fatigue and pain all over the body.

I don't even know what is considered a normal 'bowel movement' anymore. Nothing is normal for me now. Since my last flare up I have suffered some extremely painful bowel movements. Yeah, I know this is gross and I expect, unless you have the same disease, you won't read this blog. Anyway, I get constipation so bad that it feels like I am trying to pass a boulder. I spend anywhere from 1-3 hours in the bathroom waiting it out. It's horrible and frightening. To try to improve things I eat Activia for breakfast, take 1 oz concentrated aloe vera juice in the morning before I eat and I drink an Ensure shake up to twice a day with 3 grams of fiber, antioxidants to improve the immune system and omega 3's. I know that in order to have a healthy colon, you are supposed to eat at least 25 grams of fiber per day, but fiber seems to make things worse for me and I don't even eat that much food in one day. I'm thinking I might need to increase my aloe vera dose to two times a day. If anyone has any helpful advice, I would love to hear it. Someone just mentioned that flax seed has fiber so I might start taking a small dose and gradually increase it and see what happens. I eat wheat crackers, bread, rice and pasta with salmon or chicken and steamed veggies. My only real vice that I know is bad for me is chocolate. I have cut back but I can't stop eating it. Chocolate cravings for me are like a cigarette smoker trying to quit smoking.

I guess that's enough for today. My vow is to add content to this blog at least once a week so anyone out there in cyberspace coming across my posts will be subjected to more gross outs from my experiences with a mad colon.

Cheers and good health!
Colitis Chick

Preventing a flare up

One thing I have learned to do is keep a list of foods that I cannot eat. This is the best way to prevent a flare up. Each person is different so you have to experiment to see which foods irritate your stomache. For me it is nuts, beans, garlic, fried foods and onions. This does not make eating fun that's for sure because I love nuts and hummus. I found out the hard way that hummus, though the beans used are crushed, does not agree with me. And eating out at a restaurant is a pain because it seems that everyone uses garlic and/or onions to prepare food. Now I am one of those people who request a special meal. It sucks having a condition like UC, but I have learned to live with it. At least I can still enjoy chocolate in small quantities. The time when I cannot eat chocolate is the time when I cease to enjoy life.

I am still taking Asacol in a reduced dosage and am doing well. Lucky for me I responded to this treatment. I need to see my doctor on a regular basis and get blood tests, but my life is much better now. My weight is back to normal though I would have liked to keep it down. That was my favorite part of having a flare--instant weight loss. I am able to exercise and do everything I was doing before my big flare. Not looking forward to the next colonoscopy, but at least I know I will never get colon cancer because having this procedure will detect it before it gets a chance to grow. I still get bummed when I think of what is happening to my body, but when I get down, I remember that I am relatively healthy and taking care of my body will help me from having any more huge flare ups. At least I hope so.

Stay healthy!

The upside to UC

If there is an upside it has to be that I lost weight. At first, it was too much weight too fast, but now that I have my UC under control, I have gained some weight back. Now I am at a weight I am happy with. Having UC means having to eat right, which means no salads, no nuts, no red meats and no greasy foods. Steamed veggies are better than raw ones. Everyone is different so you have to find the foods that irritate you and eliminate them.

I am eating much better now and I feel better. My latest colonoscopy was clean and I was so thrilled. The Asacol is working great for me. I am lucky because I responded to the medicine. That's not always the case. I also had a mild attack. Given the intense pain I was in and how sick I was, I would hate to experience a severe attack. Remembering the pain is what keeps me on track with eating the right foods. That is not an area you where you want to be experiencing intense pain. Believe me. It was freaking me out.

It's kind of a bummer because I love nuts, especially walnuts, but nuts are the worst thing I can eat. Luckily they have improved on rice cakes because I can eat those. I may have to watch what I eat, but I look much better in a bathing suit now.

Keeping a positive attitude

I try to keep a positive attitude while dealing with this illness, but I admit that this is something I still need to work on. It is so easy to fall into depression after being diagnosed with a serious illness. It changes your life. My life has changed so much. I was already dealing with reactive arthritis, but I had that under control when this new bomb hit me. I feel like my body has betrayed me. I go back and forth from feeling positive to feeling doomed. My latest dark feelings about this have to do with the gloomy future I have of endless medical prodedures and medical bills. But if I think about it, why am I dwelling on what hasn't even happened yet? Many things could change before then. I already tend to think that 'the glass is half empty' anyway so I really need to work on being more positive.

Writing really helps me forget my own problems and escape into my characters' minds. It really is a useful tool for staying positive. I would suggest to people who don't do any creative writing to at least keep a journal to channel their negative feelings.

Another useful tool is watching a funny show like Everybody Loves Raymond. Laughter really is the best medicine. Or just take in a beautiful sunset or moonlit night. Stopping to live in the moment and admire the beauty of nature makes me forget my troubles.

That is my new mantra--Live in the moment and don't dwell on the future.